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Birthday Tammy Logic

Last night in bed my husband and I had the following conversation about my birthday.

Xander: Happy Almost Birthday!!
Me: *Sigh*  Only a half hour left of my youth…
Xander: Oh the daaaah-RAHMAAA!!
Me: It’s true.  Tomorrow I’ll be 34, and do you know what that means?  Next year I’ll be 35!
Xander: All that and you can count too?  I’m so lucky…
Me: No, seriously, 35 sounds so much older than 34.  When you were 19, didn’t 35 sound absolutely ancient?  As long as I’m not 35 I haven’t really felt old.
Xander: Wait a minute, I will be 35 this year!!  Thanks!
Me: *ignoring him* Then, do you know what comes after 35? 36!  Once I hit 36 I’m on the way to 40! *Starting to feel weepy*
Xander: I hate to break it to you, but you are heading for 40 now.
Me: *Shockhorror*  I MOST CERTAINLY AM NOT!!!!!
Xander:  Um, yes you are.  If you are heading for 35, you are also heading for 40.
Me:  NO. I. AM. NOT.  I am heading to 35, not 40, 35.  Once I’m 36 I’ll be heading to 40 but right now I am heading to 35.  Do you hear me?   You are wrong.
Xander: I’m getting the feeling this is another one of those Tammy Logic things…
Me:  No, it’s a fact. Right now I am heading up a hill towards 35. *Upward motion with hand*  Once I turn 35 I’ll be at the top.  Then once I turn 36 I’ll be on my dooooowwwwn towards 40.  So right now I am not heading towards 40, I’m heading towards 35.  You see?  So when I turn 36 I will be heading to 40.  Not 45, 40.  Cuz when I get to the bottom I will go uphill again when I am heading to 45, which won’t be 50, it will be 45.  Do you see now?  *Breathlessly making up and down motion with hands*  UP, Down, UP, Down.
Xander:  Umm, yes.  You are still heading for 40 though.
Me:  *Silent while wondering if I could kill him and get out of the country before they catch me*  Iamnot.  *mutters*

I dunno, it makes perfect sense to me.  Clearly, he is wrong.

About Tammy

A Canadian living in France with her Dutch hubby after 17 years in the Netherlands. A total TV and movie junkie who is never not knitting. She also enjoys other crafts, nail art, cuddling her dogs and general geekery. Otherwise just working on getting by and making a life for herself in her 'new' country.

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  1. That sounds like a conversation Katie and I would have. Happy belated birthday, BTW.

    kapgars last blog post… Welcome to my nightmare…

  2. Happy Birthday!

  3. Yeah, I just turned 26 and I feel I’m on the fast track to 30. My husband laughs at me because he’s almost 31.

    Either way – have a happy birthday! And don’t worry, 40 is still a ways away :)

  4. Happy Birthday, let me know how 34 feels, I have a few years left yet. Man I will be 30!!! next year, 29 next month. Man time flies.

    Have a good one. No matter what age your heading for.

    Melissa Ds last blog post… I thought I would never have to say/do this…

  5. A very BIG Happy Birthday to you!!!!

    Sonyas last blog post… Easy Tuna Fish Cakes

  6. happy birthday tammy!!! have fun!

  7. Happy Birthday…. It really does get better. When you hit 50. lol

  8. pfffff MEN! There will never get our absolutely perfect logic!

  9. *bites tongue*

    Feliciteerd, sweetie!

  10. Happy Birthday Tammy!! Panic not – I turned 40 last year and life just gets better and better the older you get.

    Have a great day.

  11. Hehe, I see I should stop being worried about getting old when I am just 20+ But time is depressing, no-one can deny that.

    Happy birthday! I hope that your future will be only better and better :)

  12. Happy Birthday Tammy! On your uphill journey…

    Teras last blog post… Citizenship

  13. hahaha sorry girls! I was going to put P.S. SORRY PAULE at the end, but then I knew my sister would go, BITCH WHAT ABOUT ME?! Then I’d have to be P.S. Sorry Paule and Kathy… but then I thought about Lynda.

    So I’ll just say sorry to everyone over 35 right now! SORRY! haha

    Thx for the birthday wishes!

  14. …except HAPPY BIRTHDAY of course ;)

  15. I’m sayin nothin……..

  16. Just to let you know, I’m kicking you when I see you or I’m going to stick my finger in the cheese powder I have for you…

    *sticks tongue out*

    Melissas last blog post… Apeldoorn

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