Comments on: Truth In Blogging

By: Bluefish

Bluefish — Thu, 18 Jun 2009 06:39:43 +0000

At first I was very happy to read many expat blogs from Scandinavia, but I slowly lost the connection with them due to unknown reason. Now I just stopped reading some blogs all together.

It’s hard to feel accepted by those who are greatly different than me in my opinion. It’s hard to be well liked when one is very opinionated.

By: Canucky Woman

Canucky Woman — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 10:58:54 +0000

I’m somewhat excluded as well. I’ve excluded myself as well, as I do feel like the square peg when I’m not with my Dutchie and his friends.

When you say “it’s better off that way in case I disappoint someone”, it kind of echoes what I feel sometimes — that you’re always being judged and compared…by how fast you integrate, how fast you learn the language, and our old home country standards of success of what you own or what you do.

Hard to deprogram that out of yourself when you move here…or remember that we are judging ourselves more than others are judging us. And those who do judge you aren’t worth the time of day. Pffft to them.

By: Bluefish

Bluefish — Tue, 16 Jun 2009 06:30:22 +0000

One thing that has always stopped me from meeting more is the underlying fear of them not being who they make themselves out to be on their blogs.

This is exactly how I feel? I’m scared to meet other expats and I have not established a relationship with them. Sometimes I feel excluded from the expat community, but I think it’s better off that way in case I disappoint someone.

As for the fictional blog, maybe these people want to feel good about themselves that they need to write something completely different from their life.

By: Andrea

Andrea — Sun, 14 Jun 2009 01:06:55 +0000

It’s really hard to say without seeing the content of the blog, and although my personal style is to “tell it like it is” – I don’t have anything against someone writing a fictional blog as long as it’s not doing any harm. But how do we define harm? In this case Tammy pointed out that giving an overly optimistic picture of life in the Netherlands may depress those whose life ain’t going as well. It surely couldn’t be very helpful for those who are thinking of the expat life but haven’t taken the leap yet. So in this case, yes I think that would be doing harm. On the other hand we all need to take content on the Internet with a grain of salt, so if someone were to make the big move and change their life dramatically based on “the good stuff” they read in a blog, that’d be a bit naive on their part. Everything in life has a good and bad side, and it’s a lesson we go through in realizing that and being prepared.

However I do think that it would be polite to at least have a disclaimer if the content is partly or fully fictional, but maybe the writer doesn’t realize that there may be consequences for someone out there in the world that believes her text and just thinks that there can be no harm in it.

Perhaps it’s something similar to what Canucky Woman talks about – that trying to envision a better life and dream about it will slowly have you migrate towards it.

People do all sorts of freaky stuff in this world. Ironically, if we had been in the same shoes with the same history and life events, we most likely would be doing the same thing to deal with it.

Thank goodness there are honest, open and truly helpful blogs around like Tammy’s to balance it all out. :-)

By: Elise

Elise — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 16:47:54 +0000

i get what you mean! Elises last blog post... Doctor

By: Ginger Magnolia

Ginger Magnolia — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 16:13:21 +0000

Wowee! A few months ago, there was a blogger who had been telling everyone she was dying of cancer, along with a bunch of other problems which simply weren't true. She was supposedly a teenager, and had a large following of well-meaning bloggers who were there for her every crisis. Many of them spent hour chatting with her online before realizing that there was no way that all of these things could have been happening to her at once. She finally came clean. Boy oh boy was that an uproar! The only thing I write that isn't true or real are the names I use for myself and others. Everything else is a real as it gets. I've gotten some nasty comments on some of my more self absorbed, whiney posts, but hell...that's what I needed to get out at the time! Ginger Magnolias last blog post... Zooper Wednesday

By: mmichele

mmichele — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 12:29:21 +0000

I always expect truth in blogging... but I know most of the bloggers I read, at least second hand or something like that. Making up a fake life for your blog sounds like something to which they are going to give a fancy psychological soon. And I promise I really did go to Paris. mmicheles last blog post... Un

By: Bonnie J. Rough

Bonnie J. Rough — Thu, 11 Jun 2009 08:48:01 +0000

My heart rate went up a little just now, thinking I might be in trouble… but surely my last post doesn’t cross the line…

By: Amber

Amber — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 17:11:22 +0000

I've had this experience before - the person was nothing like they'd claimed to be online. He presented himself as a highly educated person, when in reality, he never graduated from high school, worked as a house painter and was a complete douche. Making up a persona online is never going to do anything for you because eventually you'll get caught. In my younger years, I might have been a little more apt to do such a thing, but I'm too old for that shit these days. Writing is my passion, and I have no intention of lying with my words. Ambers last blog post... Of Lawyers and Houses

By: Denise

Denise — Wed, 10 Jun 2009 15:08:44 +0000

Ok having gone back and re-read everything. I think this is just someone who really wants to help others and is lonely. They aren’t causing any harm. Just writing about things that make them feel good and in the process making it into a story. Like Beebs said also, maybe it’s all to give family and friends in the states a sense that all is well with her. When in reality it’s not. And therefore for her own reason not wanting to worry them with her problems.
Whatever the reason I wish her well.