I could live without the rainy, dreary winter weather here in the Netherlands.

Sammi and Ronnie from Jersey Shore. I will admit to watching it when I’ve run out of other shows, and I cannot stand these two.  I don’t know how the rest haven’t drowned them in the hot tub yet.

My period. Seriously, I’ve had almost 300 of them already, enough is enough.

Justin Bieber.  I’m SO over this kid, even if he IS Canadian.

People who are passive aggressive, give thinly veiled insults on Facebook but face to face act so sweet that sugar wouldn’t melt in their mouth… and are stupid enough to think I can’t see through it.  Yes I know this is somewhat passive aggressive too, I’m just trying to speak their language!

Screw you, I’m not looking for photos of those.  The sooner people stop showing them, the better.

This bad boy.  If you don’t know what it is already, you don’t want to… and I’m not going to tell you.

Housework, I could definitely live without housework.  In fact, I hate it so much I’d almost even consider polygamy, just so I can be first wife and make second wife do all the housework.

This ignorant douchebag.

There are so many things that irritate me about this show, even more than I listed on that post way back when. Even Sue Sylvester wasn’t able to save it for me.

The Kardashians.  Where the hell did they come from and why should I give a shit about them?  Go away and stop taking up space where I want to read about REAL celebrities, thx.

Pickles.  Not a fan.

Cold sores. Haven’t had one in ages (knock wood) but I know when I do ever get one again, it will be at the worst time possible. Zovirax is my friend.

Unexpectedly scary videos.  I could definitely live without those.  You know the ones.  Someone sends you a link telling you to read along with something or to watch something closely and then WHAMMO!!!!! something scary and screeching pops onto the screen suddenly, scaring the shit out of you.  I enjoy scary movies and thrillers, when I KNOW they are scary.  When people trick me into being startled is when they take their lives in their hands.  Assholes.

Oh man this list could go on for days, so I’m going to stop here.  Let’s just say, there are a lot of people and things I’d gladly wipe from the universe if given the choice!

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As you know, I’m a big Reality TV junkie.  I’ve been subjecting myself to the insanity of American Idol for years, even though I not-so-secretly hate it.   I’ve watched Project Runway, Survivor, The Amazing Race, Hell’s Kitchen and endless other reality shows as well.   I’m not sure why I like it, but I think a part of it is watching people do what they love.  Whether it’s singing, cooking or dancing… people are on some of these shows trying to make their dreams come true.

I can’t remember a more touching example of that than what I witnessed recently with Susan Boyle, on Britain’s Got Talent.   I was forwarded a link to a Dutch website with an article titled “Ugly English Woman Has Talent”, god – what a way to describe someone!   When she stepped out on stage, nobody took her seriously and a part of me was dreading that the title of the article was actually sarcasm and she was going to sound terrible.  I felt sad for her already.  It wasn’t though, and she was amazing.

This unemployed 47 year old British woman has sent the world in a tailspin with her amazing singing talent.   Overnight, she has become a singing sensation with videos of her audition getting millions upon millions of hits.   There are even rumors about Simon Cowell already trying to sort her out a record deal.

What I love most, is how little anyone expected this from her.   In her interview she says that she’s been picked on a lot as a child, and has never been married or even kissed. In other articles I read, it explained how she spent years looking after her ill mother and that she has learning disabilities due to a lack of oxygen at birth.

I’ve watched the video about ten times already and every time it’s brought tears to my eyes.   Chances are you’ve already seen it too, but just in case you haven’t, I have to share.  I think everyone should see this.

People can bash Reality TV all they want, but moments like this are what it’s really all about.

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If you are watching this season and haven’t seen the winner yet, stop reading now!!  There will be major spoilers.

It’s no secret that I’m a Reality TV junky, so it will come as no surprise that I’ve been following Big Brother UK for the past few years.   I enjoy it far better than the US version for a number of reasons:

• The housemates are much more real.  It’s not a house full of Kens and Barbies with the odd old or ugly person thrown in.  They are real people with real lives.  They even go to the opposite extreme sometimes by throwing in people who have issues that people don’t get to see every day.  Like Darnell (albino black man), Mikey (blind) and my favorite of all and winner of BB7 in the UK (also my favorite season BY FAR, download it here), Pete Bennett.  He has Tourettes and was the best and most interesting housemate ever.  He deserves a video. Here are his best bits.

• The housemates are not allowed to scheme and discuss nominations like in the US version.  While I admit it does add an extra level of bitchiness and fun to BBUS, I prefer the UK style because then housemates really have to get by on how they portray themselves to the other housemates.  There are still alliances and obvious groups of friends but there is no planned group nominating, no veto and no back-dooring.   The housemates nominate, those with the most nominations are put up for eviction and the public votes to eliminate.   So what they do behind the scenes and their attitudes in the diary room and such DO matter because the public sees it all.
• There is a large crowd there for all the evictions and the housemates get a true feeling of how the public feels about them.  It’s not his ‘studio’ audience crap like on BBUS.
• DAVINAAAA!!!  Davina McCall is the best, funniest, most entertaining television presenter ever.  That is a fact.  So needless to say, she kicks the robotic Julie Chen’s ass to hell in back in pretty much every way possible.   I watch the eviction episodes more to see her than to see who gets evicted sometimes.
• Swearing, boobs, dicks, sex, alcohol, fights… you get it all on BBUK!!

Now, having said that, this season of BBUK was DREADFUL!! It falls 100% on the shoulders of whomever was responsible for choosing the housemates.   I have never seen such a sour, pissy, boring and completely irritating group of people ever.   With the exception of a few (VERY FEW) I was sickened to think of any of them winning.   If it weren’t for previous seasons being so highly entertaining I’d never watch it again.

So who won this season?

RACHEL!!

You know what that means?  It means that Rex, the vile, spoiled, man-child DIDN’T!! HOORAY!!

If Rachel had been in any of the other seasons I’d seen I probably wouldn’t have been rooting for her to win.  She would have paled in comparison with some of the fantastic housemates of the past.   In this season though, she was the lesser of all the evils.  In fact, she was not evil at all, something Rex and others continuously gave her grief about.

Lets face it.  The girl deserves the money.  She was stuck in a house with a group of idiots and was pretty much the only person to not complain.   Even her sickeningly sweet best friend  HAPPY HAPPY HOUSE Kathreya pitched a fit every now and then and ran off crying.

She stuck to her guns, didn’t let anyone drag her down or feel bad about herself, in spite of all their efforts.  Well done Rachel!

Note to Channel 4:  Please choose better housemates next season or I’m afraid our relationship isn’t going to work out.

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Today I was watching an episode of Canada’s Next Top Model and then had this conversation with my husband.

Breigh says (8:12 AM):
yeah, models are smart
Breigh says (8:13 AM):
a model guest judge on Canada’s next top model just commented on one of the contestants
Breigh says (8:13 AM):
‘when I look at her I see canada’s, I see half black, half Asian and half white’
*Hubby* says (8:13 AM):
hahaha, wtf
*Hubby* says (8:14 AM):
she must be slightly overweight then
*Hubby* says (8:14 AM):
cuz that’s a whole lot of woman
Breigh says (8:14 AM):
haha
*Hubby* says (8:15 AM):
mind you, she’s a model, 1.5×0 is still 0
*Hubby* says (8:15 AM):
“she’s a size zero, zero means she doesn’t exist”

The last line is a quote from Richard Rubin, who was a contestant on Beauty and the Geek, when he realized that his partner was a size 0.  I think it was one of those things you had to see to understand just how funny it was.  I wish I could find a video of it…

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I’m glad Taylor won but I don’t know if it’s because I really liked him or because of the fact that I really DON’T like “McPhever” (Gag me). He is good and all, and definately entertaining… but is he a Carrie Underwood, Kelly Clarkson or *Heart* Bo Bice *Heart*?? I don’t think so.

Btw, I put the hearts around Bo Bice even though I think he did terrible on his guest appearance at the beginning of the season, and his single really blows. I *heart* him in memory of the great performances he gave during last season ( Whippin’ Post anyone?! )

I remember how I used to really love the show, how I couldn’t wait to watch it to see who was going to be kicked off… and how ticked I’d get if someone was kicked off that I didn’t want to be. I’d get when someone was kicked off I didn’t want to be. This season I didn’t really give a crap! I liked Mandisa, Chris and Taylor but nobody really thrilled me.

Gotta say the final episode was good though, a lot more stars than usual. That reminds me, OH MY GOOD LORD!! How horrible were the performances by Meatloaf and Toni Braxton. I was sitting there watching them and wishing the judges could comment on their performances, they’d get SLAYED!

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This month has been spent doing a lot of soul searching. I haven’t found anything so the search is still on.. I’ve been thinking about life, as usual. All the things that come with it, what I want to do with mine. You know, the usual.

Having two people roughly my age die since I turned 30, it’s really shaken me inside. Not just a subtle reminder of how short life is, but a big ol’ punch to the nose. The kind that makes your eyes water uncontrollably. It makes me think of the last 6 years here in the Netherlands and question how I want to spend my next 6, and where..

We’ve been discussing life at length, our lives together. Will it work? Will I ever be happy here? Will he be happy somewhere else? Will we ever make it possible to move? I have a million questions and neither of us have any answers.

Oh, I do have some news. I finally went for the HSG Test that I’ve been putting off for months now. It was every bit as embarassing and invasive as I expected, not to mention PAINFUL!! I knew it would hurt but it was nearly unbearable at times.. I’m guessing that is sort of what labour must feel like. Unfortunately, from what we could see on the screen.. it looks like one of my fallopian tubes is either blocked or completely closed. We don’t know which and won’t until the 10th when we see the doctor. The radiologist who was doing the test tried to be positive and said things about how it’s not 100% but I looked it up online and did a fair bit of research on it and it was obvious from what we were looking at that one tube was fucked.

I’m not sure how I feel about it. On the one hand it’s comforting to know I’m not nuts and that all this time that I’ve felt deep down that there was something wrong inside of me, I was right. On the other hand, I’m sad.. because it means having a child is going to be even more difficult now.

All I know is, if I get the “Go home and have sex.. ” speech this time there is going to be some screaming at Ikazia Ziekenhuis! After 2.5 years and the latest test results, if they won’t finally help us medically.(I mean we are insured for it all for petes sake!) .. I’m going to lose it. Give me drugs, artificial insemination, IVF… ANYTHING!

Moving on..

American Idol has started again *rubs hands together* I think I might have a new Bo Bice, only not quite on Bo’s level. His name is Ace Young and I’m sort of torn. He’s cute alright, but he seems a little feminine. He doesn’t have Bo’s raw sex appeal that makes me claw at the screen of my monitor after downloading the latest show. Bummer..

Time will tell..

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The thing is, the entire time I’m watching it, the same thing keeps catching my eye and making me feel like I want to jump through the screen with a tissue. It’s the lipstick on these people!

Here are the two worst culprits:

Yeah, I said PETE… that’s a man. Although to look at him in some photos you’d never know it.

To look at these two, you wonder if they even have eyes. You can’t really see it so well in the photos I’ve given but if you watched the show I KNOW you know what I’m talking about. It’s this habit of drawing new lip lines far outside the actual line of your lips and then filling it in with lipstick. Why do women (err.. and men now I guess) do this?! Do they not understand that the line of their lip can still actually be seen?

Is this some sad result of their lack of parental guidance as a child? Did nobody ever teach them to color INSIDE the lines?

It makes me crazy! If people want to have full lips, that’s what plastic surgery is for! You can’t just draw them on! It’s like a woman stuffing her bra and wearing a top low enough to see the tissue sticking out…. or a man stuffing a pair of tube sucks down his pants but leaving the little stripey bit hanging out at the waist. If you don’t have it, you don’t have it! It’s really that simple.

Otherwise the show is great. Dennis Rodman is on there spending all his time trying to get laid and there are a bunch of other British wierdos I’ve never heard of before downloading it. They swear lots, which would never fly on American television. That’s worth getting it for alone…

I can’t wait to see who wins.

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By that time it will have been 2 years since I’ve seen them. Again, far far too long. They will be here from May 3rd – May 17th and I absolutely cannot wait. It’s nice having something to look forward to like this. It also gives me some motivation to get off my ass and finish the painting around the house and other things that need to be done before they get here.

The winter seems to be going by quickly, and we haven’t really had any horrible winter weather. Yeah it’s been grey and gloomy like mostly every other winter but I don’t remember the freezing rainy weather of past winters. Before I know it, it will be spring .. my batteries will be recharged, my family will be here… *Sighs happily*

Been watching the American Idol tryouts and I can’t say I’ve seen anyone with any real promise it. Although, we probably won’t see that until they get to Hollywood and are really tested.

Again, been thinking about what the heck I want to do here work/study-wise. I’ve even been thinking of trying to go back to my old job here doing market research, only part time. I think I might hate it a bit less if I’m not spending 40 hours a week doing it. Also, I wonder if I might have tried to jump in too quick back then. I was feeling even more crap then than I am now and tried to take on this job full time, might have been a mistake. Plus, with the turnover in that place there must be new people in charge by now haha Hopefully that scary Scottish guy is gone. I still have to think on it though… I really did hate that place, but I can’t deny as much as I hated it, it felt great to earn my own money. I know their minimum hours you can work per week is 12, even if I started out at the minimum to see. Bah I dunno. Getting paid to get told off all day isn’t really the best job a gal like me could go for, but I don’t see a lot of other options.

I have a confession to make… this weekend I took down my Christmas tree. Yes, it was up that long. I considered leaving it up and decorating it with hearts and stuff and just making it a valentine’s day tree .. until I could decorate it with eggs and make it an Easter tree… but that seemed a little too nutty .. (No, I didn’t seriously consider that, it was a joke to try to deflect from the fact that I was a lazy cow and took my tree down almost a month late)

Bailey is sitting here next to me on the sofa, asleep propped up against a blanket that is bunched up on the other end. He looks so adorable I just want to kiss him. I can’t imagine what mothers must feel like with their children if I feel this much for a dog. Hopefully one day in this lifetime I’ll know what that feels like.

I gave him a wee bit of a haircut yesterday because he hasn’t gone to the dog groomer in far too long. I just cut around his eyes so he could see because he was looking a little bit like a mop… I don’t think I’ll have a career in dog grooming anytime soon. Let’s just put it that way.

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Bo, Bo Bice, that is. If you don’t know who Bo Bice is you clearly are not cool enough to be reading my blog. That is all I have to say on the matter!

Tonight I am making sweet and sour meatballs for dinner. There really isn’t anything more to that story other than the fact that I really love sweet and sour meatballs. What I don’t like is making them. The meat is always cold and makes me think back to when I was a teenager and got a job working in a chinese restaurant where I slaved on Saturday and Sunday mornings making eggrolls. Hey maybe there is a story behind the meatballs afterall!

I remember I was still in high school and still dating high school sweetheart, D. He got a job working at a placed called the Peking washing dishes and somehow roped me into taking a job there making eggrolls. I thought I’d be in the kitchen with my boyfriend and these other people he always talked about. No not the case! I was trapped in the basement with this older chinese woman who didn’t speak a word of english. When I asked the owner if I was allowed to have a little radio down there I was told, “NO!”.

On Saturday morning we’d dump the cabbage, ground beef, 5 spice mix and the other stuff that went int the egg rolls into the most massive metal bowl I’ve ever seen. We’d stay bent over that bowl mashing the stuff until my back screamed for mercy and my hands were numb from the cold. Then we’d sit with these metal trays and grab blobs of this mixture and squeeze it into a cylinder shape and fill the trays up with them. That was the Saturday part of my job.

On Sunday I’d go back in and the little blobs would be taken out of the fridge and we’d sit at this table. We’d unwrap the eggroll wraps and place them in two rows of four. Then we’d mix up this paste mixture with flour, water and egg. With a brush we’d brush across the rows and down so that all the edges of these wrappers were covered in this paste. We’d then place a little blob in the middle of each, roll it up, press it dwn and then squeeze the ends together. Then we’d place them on another tray where they’d go into the fridge to wait to be cooked.

There we’d sit for hours, across from each other, not saying a word…. It really was like slave labour. But DAMN, were they the best eggrolls I’ve ever eaten!

Other random things I remember about working there:
The people who owned the restaurant were total crooks.
One of the owners worked in the kitchen. He was chinese but his name was Michael? Wtf… He used to hit on me in a really sleezy way. He was old, and he was ugly. I was a teenager.. he didn’t have a chance.
Another one of the cooks carved a giant carrot into the shape of a penis and chased me with it.
My boyfriend thought he was funny by getting me to sniff some box of stuff that made me feel like my eyes were going to bleed.

Fuck sake, looking back on that job I’m sure there were at least one or two laws broken and a sexual harassment lawsuit in the making. Why didn’t I do anything about it then? I could have sued those small town Chinese mafia men for every penny they had! *Sigh* But then where would people get the amazing eggrolls?

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*Sigh* The memories… Damn, how I loved that guy! (and still do after watching it again… and again… )

Bo Bice – Whippin Post

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