My Spicy Little Life

You know how they say variety is the spice of life?  Well, yesterday I had a moment where I just sat and thought about how lucky I am to be where I am, with the people I’m with, doing the things I do.

So often I feel like my life is a complete bore compared to other people I know.  Due to the circumstances of the timing of my move and the intense reaction I had, building a career didn’t really happen.  I planned on being a stay at home mom, but then the mom thing didn’t happen which triggered an equally intense reaction.  It took me a long time to accept that my life wasn’t going to turn out the way I imagined it would in Canada.

I think it’s natural to feel like our lives are boring when compared with other people who live in different places and are having different experiences.  When I go back to Canada and talk to people who are living the lives I used to wish I did, I sometimes sit there a little shocked when they tell me how jealous they are that get to go the places and see things that they never have or maybe never will, and how exciting they imagine my life to be.

Wait, what?

Usually I’ll correct them and tell them that it’s really not as exciting as it seems, that I spend most of my time lost and arsing around wasting time.  I’m not really a world travelling jet setter, I just play one on Facebook!

Seriously though, have you ever had one of those moments where reality hits you smack in the face? I’ve had it loads of times, but in more unpleasant ways… like when my doctor told me I was too fat and to lose weight (ok he was right, but I still hated him for a bit for that kick in the ass).

My latest one was a good one though, a dose of reality that made me smile.

Yesterday I went out for a coffee morning with friends.  There were people there I knew as well as some I hadn’t met before.  I had a really good time chatting with all the ladies and at one point when everyone was sitting around me talking, I had a quiet moment with my own thoughts.

I stopped for a moment, looked around and it hit me… just how FUCKING COOL it is to live here!  Honestly!

One of the things I always loved about home was the familiarity.  That the people were just like me and grew up with the same experiences, spoke the same languages and could really get me.

Here’s the thing though, while there is a comfort that comes along with that, which I’ll probably always love, what do you really learn from it?  How did I not get bored with the lack of real variety in the people I was spending time with?   Sure, we’d maybe have different hobbies or go different places on holiday, but when it all came down, we were all somewhat cut from the same cloth.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that people back home are boring or there is anything wrong with them.  That’s not what I mean.  What I’m trying to say is that in such a small community, we all grew up in the same place, went to the same schools and knew the same people.  We shared the same culture, language and overall life experiences.  So in that sense, we were all generally living the same life.

multicultural As I looked around me yesterday, I realized that there was really nobody there who was just like me, and that wasn’t a bad thing.  There were people I had a lot in common with that I really like, but they were all different.  There were ladies from India, Germany, Canada, USA, Belgium, Denmark, etc who have all had different life experiences that eventually brought them to the Netherlands.

One of the girls is planning an Indian Culture Night during Diwali to celebrate her New Year and give everyone else a glimpse into her world.  They are all planning a night out at an African Restaurant to see what that is like (I won’t be attending as I’m still a little iffy about dinging out while on the new diet, but I still think it’s such a cool idea). I learned that there is an actual Santa Claus in Finland, with a proper Santa’s Village and everything!

… and I totally want to go there!!  Another reason why having a kid would be handy.  I mean, who wants to be the creepy childless couple trolling around Santa’s Village.

Anyway, I came home yesterday in a fantastic mood, because it was one of many experiences lately that make me truly appreciate where I am in life right now.  Those people are right, my life IS exciting because I’m having new experiences all the time. Experiences that I may have never had if I hadn’t taken the leap of faith and come here to live.

I used to be intimidated and insecure around people who were so different from me, who had so much more world experience. I’m glad that I’ve learned to embrace them and learn from them because it’s makes life so much more interesting.

I am never going to refer to my life as boring again.  If I am bored, I’m not trying hard enough, because I really do have the world at my fingertips here.

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26 comments

  1. Every now and then I get that same feeling, too–I’ll sit there and think, “Wow, my life is boring as hell, all I do is work and label tubes and…waitaminnit!”

    LOL, my mom just told me this weekend, when I told her about my blog, “But isn’t your life kind of, well, boring?” To which I said, “It’s not the living, it’s the perspective.” :-)

  2. I have these moments too. Most of them have to do with education. I completed my four years university degree when I was between France and Canada, and I basically made my own classes and passed. Yet, I wish I could have had the university experience everyone is talking about, like campus, friend, boring classes etc. Meanwhile, I was traveling the world with my textbooks in my backpack, I guess I shouldn’t complain.

    Sometimes I also wonder how it feels to train for a career and stick to it. I studied Chinese which was cool but it’s not the best major to get a job. I had a lot of jobs I loved (teacher, currently a translator) but I did not train for these jobs and it’s always hard to find a position because I don’t have the matching degree.

    Oh well. I like my life anyway.

    • I totally wonder what it’d be like to have a career too. I wish I’d known what I wanted to be when I was in high school so I could have made the best of my time in college. Instead I pissed it away partying. I DO have some great memories though! haha

  3. That is really cool. I find some of my best friends are people who are very different than me. Makes life interesting!

    • Some of my friends are not like me at all, others are. That’s the best part, different friends for different things you like to do together etc :)

  4. I’m a Canadian living in London and I can totally relate. I love meeting people who I’d never have the chance to in Calgary, experiencing things that force me to grow my view of the world. I went home for a visit this summer, the first time in three years, and it became very obvious how much my European adventure had changed me.

  5. I need a like button like on FB. :)

    Nice read, Tammy. And you manage to portray such positive feelings, I love that.

    • One day there will be a way to totally integrate blog comments with Facebook, I will be a happy blogger that day!

      • I can imagine! I thought of starting a blog for my 3 month trip to Europe last year, but alas… I did one entry on FB through some blog tab I added, and then never again!

        I think my problem is that I believe no one would give a crap about my life, haha. Although, a few people have mentioned that my story would make a good book, or movie… Not buying that, lol.

  6. In 1999 we were the creepy childless couple trolling around Santa’s Village!! It’s cool, even in June which is when we were there, and as far as I remember there were many, many more adults than children……….

    • I didn’t know you guys were there! That’s so cool :) We’ll have to go on the off season… and by off season I mean before the mosquitoes are out!

  7. LOVE this post! I have had those moments and it makes me stop and pulls me out of the pissy mood I might be in. Uhm..I so wanna go and see the Santa in Finland!

  8. Moments like that are great and so is the positive feeling it leaves you with. It’s even better when those feeling/realisations just come out of the blue.

    • You’re totally right :) It’s a lot better when we don’t have to sort of LOOK for things to love here and it just happens to us.

  9. Wonderful post, I really enjoyed it. Sounds like you’ve found a great group of women to hang out with. I’m trying to find that here and your post is inspiring.

    • Calla, where are you living at the moment? It always helps to find some cool people to hang out with, it can make all the difference in the world :)

  10. Those are great moments indeed :)

  11. I’m so glad you’re feeling more positive about things these days.

    I was thinking about moments like these last week. Sometimes I take for granted the new life I’m living here — which isn’t the most wild and adventurous life, either — but every once in a while I get a reminder that it’s still quite a bit different from what I was experiencing before!

    • I’m glad too! haha it makes life a lot easier here! I sometimes try to pretend I’ve not been living here for over 10 years and try to see things the way I did in the beginning. Then just for a second I manage to do it, and it feels really weird :P

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